Dawn of the hipster
by ToTeaOrNotToTea
Summary: In which Alana is the new student in Mystic Falls and watches as people too dramatic to function, continue to function. It's… strangely fascinating. It's like watching a nature documentary, with attacks and strange mating behaviour and more.
1. Chapter 1

**Un**

* * *

Alana blinked furiously as her ditz of an uncle chattered on and on about how 'cool' and 'awesome' it was that she was going to be living with him for a year. She figured if she got her eyes to tear up, or at least appear to tear up she could use the good ole PMS excuse to get away from his cheeriness.

Not that she had a problem with cheeriness. She just didn't like it shoved in her face at 3 in the morning while the coffee maker was broken.

As the haze of sleepiness cleared she realised that was probably exactly why he was doing that. Her uncle was a little shit after all.

"Dude, shut up." He smirked at her annoyance, a reaction he was clearly gunning for and she respected him for that.

"I suggest you unpack now little Lanie, you have school in a few hours."

"You are the face of true evil."

He grinned, "You are too kind. Well, I'm off to sleep, I still have a while to go for my bartending shift." He sauntered back into his room whistling happily the whole way. She punched his arm but it had no effect on his good mood.

So, being the excellent, kind and forgiving person that she was, she began unpacking.

Everything she needed to prank the dick was in the same box as her books anyway.

* * *

Stefan was on edge. There was a new student in town. Caroline had overheard something about someone transferring and it had gotten everyone on edge. The new faces in town tended try to kill members of their little family.

His ears pricked up when he head footsteps leading into the history classroom, too light to be Alaric's while the rest of the students were already there. The door opened with a creak that hadn't been there before, sounding almost ominous and Bonnie and Elena both looked to him for confirmation before setting watch at the door.

It finally opened wide and they got a good look at the new student.

The new student was contorted mid-yawn and they couldn't see her face too well. Her short, black hair was pulled into a itty bitty ponytail, the too short strands barely held in place with a million colourful hairpins in dozens of colours. She wore a purple t-shirt and short overalls paired with doc martens, all smelling of age, like they'd been sourced from a thrift store. The only things on her that were new were the watch, a good expensive diving watch, and the giant backpack, also made for rugged use. There were red glasses hanging off the collar of her overalls and when the very long yawn finally ended, Stefan knew that she had grey eyes and also that she would need a dentist in five months because some of her cavity fillings weren't looking so good.

She looked at the class with a frown, the hollows under her eyes looking dark and almost bruised before shuffling in with a slow gait.

Caroline was the first of the troupe to engage her in conversation.

"Are you new here?"

* * *

The perky blonde was talking to her, asking her if she was new. What Alana wanted to say was 'Of course you idiot, if you've never seen me before I'm obviously new.'

But she didn't. There were better more fun ways to handle this. She dug deep into her nonexistent soul to bring fake tears to her eyes and sucked in her breath with a wet sound. "You d-don't remember me? I know you lost your memory after that fall but...they said you would remember now!"

The girl looked around at her friends who played along to the little trick, looking anywhere but at her in a stunning display of fake guilt. "Really?"

And Alana dropped the act. "No." With that she sat down at the closest empty seat, settling her head into the cradle of her arms and decided to take a brief nap.

She'd need some energy if she wanted to deal with all these idiots.

* * *

"Hey, Bonnie?" Caroline said, and Bonnie was so caught up in the weirdness that was going on that instead of flinching at the sight and sound of her once friend turned vampire, that she actually answered her normally.

"Yeah?"

"Do you think she might be a zombie?"

The answer came in a muffled tired voice emerging from the pile of hair, fabric, hands and head that was the new girl, " _Don't worry Blondie, you've got nothing to fear from me, I like my brains to be actually working."_

Elena, Bonnie and Caroline shared a look.

"Maybe you should work on your inside voice." Elena teased their blonde friend and for once in a long time Bonnie felt the slightest bit of normality descend upon their group. And then the pile of new girl spoke again.

" _Yeah, Blondie's not the only one with the inside voice problem."_

"I didn't know zombies had such good hearing." Bonnie snarked at the girl and almost as if in slow motion the pile of new girl rose from the depths to emerge as an almost functional human being.

" _Braaaaains!"_

Oh yes, this might be end up being a fun year after all.

* * *

 **Un**


	2. Chapter 2

**Zwei**

* * *

"Hello, class. What are we learning today?"

Alana woke up from the nap she was indulging in with a start. Luckily the teacher hadn't noticed, then again, the teacher was asking the students what they were supposed to be learning, not exactly what she would call responsible and authoritative.

"With the Decades Dance tonight we've been covering the sixties all week," One of the students said and Alana jolted. Decades dance? They've been studying the sixties all week but the teacher had no clue? And this student was apparently so used to it that she didn't think twice before telling the teacher what they were studying?

What kind of shit school was this?

"Right. The sixties. The, uh, ahem..." The teacher looked oddly dazed and began writing on the board. "The sixties. I wish there was something good I could say about the sixties, but...Actually, they kind of sucked. Except for the Beatles, of course. They made it bearable. Uh, what else was there? The Cuban missile thing, the...we walked on the moon. There was Watergate."

"Watergate was in 1974 even though it is considered to be a part of the cultural decade of the sixties." Alana interrupted. "The sixties are also important because of the Stonewall riots that mark the start of the gay and trans rights movement in America to say nothing of the Civil rights movement and Second-wave feminist movements. Outside of America, the sixties were a decade in which the decolonisation of Africa grew faster, the Berlin wall began construction, coups in South Korea and Vietnam lead to temporary military rule, there were multiple civil wars all over the world, there was the destabilisation of the Middle east and of course China and the Soviet's relations becoming hostile. The sixties were _revolutionary_ and important for the development of counterculture movements that lay the foundations of the equality in society that we strive for today. So, I'd say there's more than just the Beatles making it a bearable decade."

"That's going to be hard to fit onto your outfit for the dance but whatever works ." The teacher snarked and Alana cursed in her mind.

There was going to be a lot of self-study in her future, she could just tell.

* * *

"So, new girl, what's your name again?" Blondie asked her.

"Alana."

"I'm Caroline, this is Elena, Bonnie and Stefan." Blondie flipped her hair.

"Where's the cafeteria?"

"We'll walk you there, we have lunch too." Elena said sharing a look with the pale boy who was obviously her boyfriend. "So what brings you to Mystic Falls?" She asked, clearly interrogating.

"My parents are gone and my uncle lives here so here I am."

"Oh," Elena said with sympathy, reaching out to pat her on the shoulder, "I understand, my parents are dead too and it's-"

"Uhh, before you say anything too personal, my parents are gone as in marine biologists on what is very likely going to be a year-long expedition in the middle of the Pacific Ocean kind of gone." Alana said and there was a bit of noise from Blondie's general direction that sounded a lot like a muffled snort and the hand that had been patting Alana's shoulder stopped. Awkwardly Elena looked away and pretended to dust something off Alana's shoulder before letting it fall back to her side.

"Are you excited for the dance tonight?" Blondie asked, taking over the conversation for Elena. Blondie was quickly becoming her favourite if only for the fact that she wasn't as touchy feely as Elena nor was she looking at her with barely disguised suspicion like Bonnie.

"I have been awake for the last," A quick glance at her watch and Alana shivered, "thirty three hours, twelve minutes and forty six seconds, I will spend the dance sleeping like the dead. It's going to be so amazing." There was still a bit of time left for her to be able to go back to her uncle's place and sleep so she decided to be pleasant to the group of far too interested in the new girl considering they were part of the popular clique to be normal, bunch. "So Mystic falls is supposed to have a considerable of biodiversity, is there some kind of nature club in your school?"

"Umm, I don't really know-" Elena started and Blondie took out her phone and her fingers flew over the keyboard at the speed of sound while the other three stuttered out many different ways of saying 'They weren't nerdy enough to know about it'.

"There's a Nature Conservation Club that also doubles as the local charter of this amateur nature photography group, Patrick is the club head and the biology teacher Ms Lane is the coordinator, I have their digits but you're better off meeting them in person. The next meeting is during fifth period next tuesday."

"If I ever turn to theism, you will be the first goddess I worship." Alana promised Blondie who immediately lifted her arm and gently waved it in benevolence.

"I like the sound of that, the Goddess Caroline."

"Establish enough followers, have a few meetings and you could set yourself up with a tax haven of a religious institute."

"I could make cheerleading the form of communion." Blondie said very seriously, looking absolutely enamoured with the idea and Alana knew it was no time to move as far away from her as she could. Alana got up from her seat ignoring the almost full lunch still in front of her and slowly backed away, "Write a new bible full of new rules, better ones. We could have a subsection on rules to not dressing like a tarty whore!"

Alana ran.

* * *

 **Zwei**


End file.
